The healing power of envy
22/02/2013 at 11:17 am | Posted in Healing, Inspiration, Uncategorized | 12 CommentsTags: healing, innermost feelings, inspiration, life skills, positive thinking
Earlier this month I was lucky enough to tread the red carpet at the BAFTAs – the British version of the Oscars. I was there simply because my partner was invited. However much I like to think of myself as immune to star-spotting, I am not. It was huge fun to share a rain-soaked red carpet with George Clooney, Ben Affleck, Dame Helen Mirren and Marion Cottillard, among many others. It was fun when guests grabbed a spare BAFTA trophy and we posed for the camera. And sharing the photographs afterwards was all part of the pleasure.
A week later, I was sitting in my Wiltshire studio, facilitating a meditation group. We were focusing on the theme of forgiveness. After half an hour of silence, we swapped notes. A writer friend in the group, Claire, said something endearing. “I found it very hard to focus on forgiveness at the beginning of the meditation, because I just kept thinking how envious I was of Suzanne for going to the BAFTAs,” she confessed.
Everyone in the group laughed – it was a sweetly funny moment. But afterwards, it got me thinking.
The truth is, Claire and I are alike. Whenever I hear of someone’s good fortune, there is often some envy mixed up with delight. I am happy for them, of course. But there can also be a sense of being left out, like not receiving an invitation to a friend’s party.
Envy is said to be one of the Seven Deadly Sins; it’s an emotion we’re traditionally not supposed to feel. But we do feel it, so there must be some purpose to it. What purpose does envy serve?
After the meditation session, I decided to watch out for my next experience of envy, to see what I might learn. I didn’t have long to wait: it arrived with the morning post. Among the envelopes there was a programme for the upcoming Mind Body Spirit Festival in London. My eyes went straight to the workshops, and straight to the names of the facilitators. And then, I felt stirrings of envy.
The envy could only mean one thing: I would like to run a workshop at a large event like the Mind Body Spirit festival. But mixed up with the envy were stomach-churning feelings of inadequacy and fear. There was a mouse-like element to the fear that seemed to be saying in a firm yet squeaky voice: “It’s safer to stay at home.”
The wisdom of envy
I focused in on the envy again. And deep within its energy I found these words: “Remember who you are.” And then I realised that the spiritual purpose of envy is to help us to stay on our own unique path. That path does, for sure, take us out of our comfort zone. It may be a hard path, and the only way we can do it is one step at a time. I realised that envy was telling me to quit dreaming and start doing what was required – one step at a time.
It occurred to me that many of the speakers at the Mind Body Spirit Festival workshops have written books on their subject – some of my envy lay in that direction. I am indeed in the process of writing one, on the brand of intuitive meditation that I share with others – but progress is slow. And then I realised that I need to schedule regular, daily time to my project. It’s the only way I will complete it.
In a few weeks’ time I’m doing a talk on intuitive meditation in a local town. Someone has mentioned another great local group I might get in touch with. Each small step leads to the next. With the divine help of envy, I’m starting to follow my bliss.
Now it’s your turn. What do you, perhaps, feel envy about, and what might envy’s message be for you?
Thankful, optimism, support
01/02/2013 at 5:10 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 11 CommentsTags: affirmation, Guidance, happiness, inspiration, Intuition, positive thinking, solstice, wellbeing
This is a special bag: a beaded evening purse; handed down through the generations of my family. My mother gave it to me one day last December.
I typed out a list of positive, uplifting words, and printed several copies on card, then cut them up and popped them in the bag. During the Solstice, I invited many people, upwards of 80, to take a word out of the bag and keep it with them as guidance for the year ahead.
During the Solstice get-togethers I drew a total of three words for myself: ‘Thankful’, ‘Optimism’ and ‘Support’. I looked at them, felt their specialness, then put them down and forgot about them.
January came, with snows, then wind and rain. There were winter bugs in my household, which meant I didn’t get to the gym, or go walking, or swimming. I reduced my daily yoga… gradually, imperceptibly, I was putting my wellbeing on hold. This is never a good idea, I know. But still, it happened.
And then, just yesterday, I found my three words once more: ‘Thankful’, ‘Support’ and ‘Optimism’. I hugged them like old friends. How could I have forgotten them? The truth is, I need those words every day. Each word is a tiny, effective dose of wellbeing.
If you would like me to draw a word for you out of the bag, just ask, and I’ll be happy to send you your own little dose of wellbeing.
5 reasons to love December 2012
30/11/2012 at 3:44 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 7 CommentsTags: Guidance, inspiration, Intuition, positive thinking, Spirituality
“What is all this about December 2012?” asked a meditation student. “I’ve been hearing some scary stories about the 21st, the Solstice. Should we be worried? Should I be preparing in any way?”
“What kind of scary stories?” I asked, though I had a pretty good idea.
“Oh, that there’s going to be some kind of natural disaster. You know, the world coming to an end; the Apocalypse…I’ve been reading about it.”
“Okay,” I said. “I’m going to give you some good reasons why we should love December 2012.” And here they are…
1) December 21st 2012 is the shortest day of the year, and also the date when a long cycle in an ancient South American calendar system, known as the Mayan Calendar, comes to an end. It has been suggested that this date will bring calamity. But calendars don’t create or predict events. They simply mark the days. And in any case, a new Mayan cycle starts on December 22nd.
Borders are always significant, and this border between two vast periods of time creates a pause. Within that pause there is an opportunity for old, outmoded ways of thinking to vanish, and a new, more humane outlook to flourish. This can be good for all of us.
2) Alarmist predictions about this month can actually teach us how to tell the difference between our ungrounded fears – in this case, a fear of the unknown – and our intuition. Intuition literally means ‘in-tuition’ and it is a form of teaching. We all know that good teachers care for their students and help them to achieve their best. So true guidance, whether it’s within you, or from someone in the wider world, is reassuring and uplifting – always. Trust your guidance.
3) A date can have powerful symbolic meaning, and this can be used in good and helpful ways. So, for example, December 21st 2012 is acting as a powerful focus for the ever-growing holistic movement. This movement can be summed up as this: the realization that we are all one. Humanity is one, magnificent, glorious being who is just beginning to learn that the only person we’ve been fighting all this time is ourselves – and that when we are kind to others, we are kind to ourselves.
4) This month may truly turn out to be an Apocalypse, in a positive way. The word ‘apocalypse’ comes from ancient Greek, and originally meant ‘uncover, reveal’. It developed an additional meaning of ‘insight’ or ‘vision’. So perhaps we are living through an apocalypse; perhaps it has already started. But this is a good thing. Over the past 12 months we’ve had covert wrong-doings exposed in people who run countries, businesses, banks and charities. We are living in a more transparent time, and that is to be welcomed. We are also, finally, accepting our intuitive and visionary abilities, having learnt in the last century that science and logic can lead to inhumane actions on a planetary scale. We need our insight. We need our vision.
5) Each of us can use the potential energy of this time in excellent ways. You can focus during the whole of December, and especially around the time of the Winter Solstice on the 21st, on love and peace, feeling it in your own heart, towards yourself, your family, your community, your country, and this whole beautiful planet. While you do this, you will know that countless other people are doing the same, all over the world. What we think and feel does manifest in the outer world – and the positive energy we can generate together is beautiful. Be loving to yourself, and loving to the world.
That is the real meaning of this amazing time that we are living in.
PS For your free copy of my Happiness Meditation mp3, just click here.
The real meaning of home
28/09/2012 at 3:02 pm | Posted in Happiness, Meditation, Nature, Wellbeing | 12 CommentsTags: Guidance, happiness, healing, inspiration, Intuition, meditation, nature, pre-history, Spirituality, wellbeing
In our distant nomadic past, home was where we settled for the night: it was shelter, a place we lay down – a place of rest. Recently, on the West Coast of Scotland, I came across a perfect example of home at its simplest. This stone outcrop at Sand provided shelter for our ancestors nearly 10,000 years ago. It was their bedroom, and also their kitchen: there is evidence that they collected limpets from the sea shore and boiled them up in water before eating them.
My daughter led me up and onto the roof of the shelter. “There’s a place I’ve got to show you,” she said. “You’re going to love it; it’s really special.” And she was right. On the heather-clad roof there were several broad stones: slabs of natural paving. One, in particular, was a perfect meditation seat. It was easy to sit there, gaze out to sea and simply let your thoughts drift into that in-between place – the other realm.
When I did so, I found myself talking to the inhabitants of that time. We weren’t using words, exactly, but we were communicating. To my surprise, I found they were admiring my build: the fact that compared with them I looked immensely well fed. I was aware of their lightness and slimness and superb fitness, and found myself wishing that I exercised more.
Self-acceptance
They were surprised at my lack of self-acceptance on this matter. They reminded me of the goodness of Mother Earth, or the Mother as they called her. She provided what we needed, and it made no sense to disparage her gifts. Abundance was a blessing. Each of us was a creation of the Mother. Each of us was divine. How could we criticise ourselves in that context? Criticism was utterly meaningless.
I actually had the sense they were laughing at me, as if I were a child who didn’t quite understand. And yet there was also respect. It was as if they saw wisdom in me, as I saw wisdom in them. And the wisdom wasn’t individual wisdom; it was collective. We all shared knowledge… and this knowledge was infinite awareness.
And then I understood the true meaning of home. It is unconditional love, and it is acceptance. When you are at home – truly at home – you are loved, you are accepted. During the many times we find ourselves on our own, we can still feel unconditional love and acceptance towards ourselves. And when we are with others – however distant in terms of culture, or the passage of time – we can feel that exact same connection. As I did on that rock.
Down below, a car horn was sounding. I was being summoned back to the 21st Century. I clambered down the heather slopes, sea breeze in my hair, aware that the bliss I was feeling is our natural birthright.
It’s your birthright; it truly is.
This moment now
30/07/2012 at 10:25 am | Posted in Happiness, Meditation, Nature, Uncategorized, Wellbeing | 1 CommentTags: affirmation, flowers, Guidance, inspiration, meditation, nature, Spirituality, wellbeing
This moment now is all we ever have, but it’s enough, because it’s everything.
Have a magical day.
Happiness is being open
27/07/2012 at 6:58 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 4 CommentsTags: Guidance, happiness, inspiration, Intuition, meditation, wellbeing
This week has been all about happiness: pure happiness. My meditation groups have been focusing on the word – they have breathed in “I am”, and breathed out “happiness”. Then, just this morning, I recorded a ‘Happiness’ guided meditation, which I will send out to people when they book a place on my September Intuitive Development course.
One of my favourite intuitive insights from a week of happiness is this: the opposite of happiness is control.
“Surely the opposite of happiness is unhappiness?” pointed out one guy in a group session.
That’s true, of course. However, consider the happiness levels of a young child. They are not especially in control of their lives. But in any given moment, a child can find happiness in playing with absolutely anything that comes his or her way, whether it be a twig, some earth, or a bowl of water (or even better, all three together).
Consider, in contrast, the last time you organised a fun event, like a party. Did you freely enjoy it, or did you spend a portion of your time worrying about everything that might go wrong?
When we try to control how things will turn out, that’s where unhappiness lies. In contrast, when we open up to life and accept surprises along the way, that’s when we experience happiness.
So after a week of focusing on happiness, have my happiness levels risen? Definitely, by around 100%. There’s been less rushing, and more enjoying the moment. If you haven’t done this already, I warmly recommend it: sit somewhere quietly for 20 minutes or half an hour. Breathe in “I am”, and breathe out “happiness”. And just see where the word takes you.
Spirit of the Earth
15/06/2012 at 5:06 pm | Posted in Meditation, Nature, Uncategorized | 3 CommentsTags: inspiration, meditation, nature
Following on from my last post about the Stone Age and the base chakra, here is a favourite verse, from the Navajo Blessing Way, placed with a photo I took last week in the Dordogne, France, centre of the Stone Age. Enjoy.
Easter and the Goddess of Dawn
09/04/2012 at 11:42 am | Posted in Happiness, Nature, Wellbeing | 2 CommentsTags: Easter, Guidance, inspiration, meditation, nature, self-development, wellbeing
Easter comes from the Goddess of Dawn.
Look beneath any festival and you will find simple truths about people and our planet. Easter is a great example of this. The word ‘Easter’ is a variant of ‘east’, the direction in which the sun rises at dawn.
The word has ancient roots in the seed language known as Proto-Indo-European. The original word, ‘aus’, or ‘austre’ meant ‘to shine’, particularly at dawn. It was personified in early Europe as Austron or Eostre, the goddess of spring, fertility and the rising sun. Her festival was the Spring Equinox, that time between the shortest and longest days, which heralded the beginning of the all-important growing season. The changing seasonal cycle as we journey around the sun is more important to us than our mechanised lives reveal. But beneath the confusion of 21st century timetables, our bodies still respond to the longer days of sunlight in basic ways that haven’t changed since life emerged on the planet.
We absolutely take pleasure in the new life that is around at this time, and within us ideas that were incubating over winter begin to take on real life. What does this year mean to you? What are you beginning to achieve in terms of your own self-development? This is a good time to be aware that Eostre, the Goddess of Dawn, is an archetypal force in you that is driving you towards summer and the fruition of your hopes and dreams.
Three-minute healing circle
10/12/2011 at 3:48 pm | Posted in Healing, Meditation, Uncategorized | 14 CommentsTags: happiness, healing, inspiration, meditation, Spirituality, wellbeing
Ideally, do this after a daily practice of meditation, when the mind is still and calm, and the body rested, yet alert.
Sit comfortably, with your eyes closed and your back straight, in a peaceful place where you won’t be disturbed. Take a few deep breaths, releasing any thoughts, knowing this time is for you, and for those who may wish for your help…
First minute: create the healing circle.
As you breathe in, picture a white light in the centre of you, glowing and sparkling brightly, like a diamond. As you breathe out, picture the white light radiating outwards from your hands, creating a large white circular space in front of you: a healing space. As you continue to breathe out, send out an invitation to all who may wish for healing, to enter the circle. Each time you breathe in, see the diamond at the centre of you glowing and sparkling ever more brightly. Each time you breathe out, see the healing circle in front of you shining more and more brightly. Continue to send out a general invitation to all who may wish for healing.
Second minute: maintain the healing circle.
As you breathe in, and as you breathe out, continue to maintain the shining white healing circle in front of you. See people enter the circle, and stand in it, soaking up the healing white light. You may recognise people; you may see strangers; you may see a mixture of both. You may see nothing; just trust in the process and continue. The people do not see you. They simply approach the circle and stand inside it, soaking up the light. As you continue to breathe in and out, be aware that the whole of you, too, is glowing and sparkling with healing white light.
Third minute: close down the healing circle.
Send out a thank you to all who have entered the circle, and watch them begin to leave. As you continue to breathe in and out, gradually let the light settle down, fade, and return to normal levels. As it does so, the last people leave the circle, and then the circle itself vanishes.
The minutes don’t have to be exact. They’re just a rough guide.
Three Happy Moments Game
23/11/2011 at 8:17 pm | Posted in Happiness, Parenting, Uncategorized, Wellbeing | 1 CommentTags: affirmation, inspiration, life skills, positive thinking, success, wellbeing
The unexpected fragrance of a flower as you pass by.
This is a great game to share with a child, partner or friend at the end of the day. And it’s guaranteed to make the toughest days seem better…
Simply take it in turns to share a first happy moment that happened during the day; then a second; then a third. Choose anything that comes to mind; they don’t have to follow chronological order. Here are some examples:
* seeing a tree with brightly coloured leaves, with the sun shining through them
* a letter containing good news
* thoughtful praise from a colleague
* sharing a laugh with a friend
* seeing your child’s face light up when you picked them up from school
* a blissful half-hour of meditation
* the unexpected fragrance of flowers as you walked by.
* a healthy work-out at the gym, or a yoga practice.
Over time, you get a very clear idea of the things that make you and your loved ones happy. And the more you focus on those, the more often those happy things happen. This is a win-win game.
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